In my travels across the country and globe, I have run into almost every kind of irritating traveler. Mostly, I try to ignore them. Sometimes, it is impossible. But it is best to just keep walking, sitting, or sleeping, as the case may be. Perhaps, I look that way to them?
1. The Weird Eater-it is a challenge to eat really healthy on the road. You can have your kale chips, I am on vacation, and plan to enjoy myself!
2. The Timekeeper-sometimes required for business trips, or with large groups of people. I try not to get too obsessed by time or deadlines.
3. The Fearful Flyer or Nervous Nellie-these are truly frightening people, as they are very unpredictable.
4. The Drunk-hopefully they will pass out soon, or the flight attendant will cut them off.
5. The Bad Parents-mostly it is the ones who are totally oblivious to their obnoxious kids.
6. The Horndog-you know who you are, can you just save it for the hotel bar or night club?
7. The Romantics-again, get a motel or hotel room, we need not see your technique.
8. The Adrenaline Junkies-you can spot them by their clothing, dirty shoes, and unkept grooming.
9. The Exhibitionist-more women than men, but nonetheless both irritating and eye-opening.
10. The Addictive Selfie Taker-have you ever heard them answer themselves?
11. The Smug Social Sharer-the new, most irritating type of traveler. Includes the selfie taker too!
12. The Eco Freak-relax once in a while, the airplane or hotel is not as green as you would like.
13. The Complainer-this guy or gal dominates the staff, whether on land or in the air.
14. The Wi-Fi Addict-this guy needs to relax, and smell the coffee.
15. The Conversationalist-I have learned to limit my conversation, particularly in first class.
I also came across the family from hell a few years back in Africa. They were all very, very short, the Mom, Dad, and kids. They spoke the most irritating version of French I have ever heard in my life. Of course, you just KNEW they would be French or French-speaking. Everything was a big deal. They were on the puddle jumper from the Serengeti with us. And in the small terminal and snack bar when we changed planes. If they would have boarded the same plane as us, I would have been forced to scream. Mike and I called them the family from hell!
I should have taken a real photo of them!!!!
Now, here are a few of my own:
a. The Farter-Enough said.
b. The Belcher-See above.
c. The Fixer-Always sticking their nose into your business to help you when least needed.
d. The Stinkpot-Do they not have showers or deodorant?
e. The Walking Whorehouse-Too much cheap perfume is really obnoxious!
f. The Loud Cell Phone Talker-Do they not have a clue?
g. The Smoker-For real, they still exist, particularly in Russia!
h. The Diaper Changer-Why do they insist on changing diapers on BART, airplane seats, and restaurants?
i. The “Look at Me” Person-Usually women, but sometimes a large man can fill the role, dressed for fashion show, but going to El Paso or Omaha,
j. The Barefoot Baron or Baroness-Bare feet on the plane or hotel lobby floor? Get real!
Makes you want to stay home, right?